Everything and Nothing

Everything made sense with you

Nothing made sense with you

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Your Rollercoaster Girl

I think you were waiting for me to tell you that you were off the hook three years of your life wasted the sigh of relief at breaking the contract the oath of the long haul smashed my heart in pieces and ate the soft centre the look of surprise as though you were unaware there would be sharp edges blood dripping from your mouth onto our white pillows the ones we bought in the Zara home sale will you still remember my name five years from now and my lollipop tongue will you miss my smell my laugh and think of me sometimes like pepper spray to the eyes it will hurt like the agony I felt when you left remember the Ikea furniture flat pack all over our living room floor there is still a pink stain on the wall from the wine glass I smashed in a temper tantrum like a child I throw things and like an adult you walk away from me but difference is you don’t come back I leave the mark there for proof that I did not imagine our red raw lust love that felt like forever but turned bone white regret what do you do when it is painful to stay and painful to go I think I will sit here and wait I think you will walk as fast as you can away from that rollercoaster girl.

You

Happiness looks pretty on us my love 

All I see is you

My heart is full

Is yours too?

Can we stay like this forever my love?

Before I change my mind

Before you do 

Before we find someone new.

In the End

That was how I loved you in the end

From the top of a cliff

Jumping 

A leap of faith in the dark

Falling

with grasping reaching arms

Not knowing 

if you were at the bottom

to catch me

Or not. 

Burnt

Move on, my mother told me.

If you wait for him,

you will be an old woman.

But how long does someone wait

when they would walk through fire

to reach you?

The Artist

When you tried to mould her like clay

Did you think she would stay?

She is the epitome of beauty 

and such vivid colour,

A paintbrush in one hand

and magic in another,

Like the sun 

she glowed

But you were

scared of

Her lightness

Her strong spirit

Her brightness.

She runs free now, with a new love, he is loving

And she is fearless. Do you see her? Laughing, wind in her hair,

Does it bring you to your knees?

You cannot keep a waterfall from flowing

You cannot force the sun to stop shining

You cannot cover a rainbow with a black cloud

without the colours spilling out.

Do you understand now?