Yellow Hope

That little room with bright yellow walls

How we laughed our way through the winter and summer

 

I hope yellow paint will always remind you

of my sunshine smile

My outdoor inside voice

My head on your chest

I hope you look back and think of that year together as magic

a time where you felt true happiness

 

I hope you meet another girl with a wild soul too

I hope you will be kind when she finds you.

 

-Yellow is the brightest color of the visible spectrum, and it is the most noticeable of all colors by the human eye. It means happiness and optimism; it is the color of sun shining, or bright light and creativity. … It is the color of high energy, enthusiasm, hope, fun, and cheerfulness.

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Hunter’s Moon

The October full moon came,

In autumn leaves

In death and chances,

A circle of milky white magic,

fluorescent cast,

against a starless black tablecloth

with Halloween next door

In grey fog and amongst orange pumpkins

Black ravens flocked,

I said my curses

I spoke my wishes,

The witches were out

and the

Black magic

White magic

spells

swirled through the air, thick and fast,

My October gift  to you.

Wildfire Love

And your name will pop up every blue moon as a warning mainly, remember him?

The friends who knew me then will say I loved you far too much, such a mistake they say, we are so happy you are in a better place.

Because there was love and then there was him.

But they do not know I am still right where you left. Eighteen, with bright wide eyes, my chaotic mind and wonky heart, still waiting for you to come back. I swear, this lifetime will pass in winters and summers, in life and death, and I will still love you. Years and decades will come and I will search for you in other people, I will see you in crowds, will swear I glimpsed your face for only a moment.

Because ours was a wildfire love.

It spread too quickly and before we could say slow down, we were engulfed,                    We were too caught up in each other,                                                                                        With each red and orange flame licked kiss bringing us to the precipice                              of our messed up teenage romance.

Because there was love and then there was us.

Rollercoaster Love

My life with you was a rollercoaster ride

I did not want to get off

I was used to the rise and fall in my tummy

Used to the chaos you brought

Used to the mess you left

 

There were nights when I was tucked into him

peaceful, quiet, safe,

Where I longed for your fast paced kiss.

By Night

By night, the map of your body

is like the warmth of sunlight on my hands.

I swear

I could,

with     dancing    fingertips 

trace your outline continuously

Until insanity      

came for me.

My Joy

I am convinced I had not known pure joy until I met you.

Of course, I had felt sunbeams on my face and seen beauty in sunsets and the sound of the ocean. Heard a baby’s laugh and slept in someone’s arms that I loved. Seen snowflakes and sunrises and many wondrous things. But I would have given up all pleasures of the world for you. It is not a secret that you will never stop dazzling me. I had never known beauty until you and I would not be surprised if I lived my whole life and never found wonder again.

Coffee Stained Love

The morning I left, I left you in bed

with a coffee-stained love note.

My shirt, only half tucked in,

My hair only half done, a loose bun,

but I was  halfway out the door

with one shoe on and a triangle of toast

dangling from my cherry red lips.

 

How I did not kiss you goodbye  in fear of branding you bloody

How whilst on my early commute to work

I wished I had.

Chess Piece Lover

Before the move;

Ape, murmur, obey.

I am twin of your voice

Mirror it

 

What a shame I wear day

As though I were insane,

You obedient with moves, bold echoing

motions, image, moods

 

Until you rock the enemy

Then you move

The chess piece starter

 

How incredible

to be grown, sensible,

whilst I maddening.

 

 

 

 

 

My Equinox Lover

The witching hour

Our midnight equinox secret

The raven blood and white magic that bound us together

Your love a mood stone of contrasting colours how you could not love me just black and white

A star name

An in the next life darling,

The universe of us rotating,

Parallel lines aligned, the stars finally coming together,

Oh, won’t you love me until the sky turns black and the stars scatter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Porcelain Beauty

It’s always hard when someone is in love with the idea of you

Like One false move

One wrong step

And your porcelain image will shatter in front of them,

Cracks will appear

To reveal your weaknesses and your downfalls and your past mistakes

And you will no longer be this out of reach

human

beauty

porn-star.

You are real and raw and you shit and you cry

And you are so imperfect

So wayward

So backwards in your flawlessness

It’s the artificial parts of you that they bloodlust after

Not the thoughts, emotions and feelings that overwhelm

you

It scares them that a pretty little thing can feel so much

And so

Of course, they run away

As fast as they can

With the hope that cracks do not appear

in the next porcelain beauty.